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Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Log Cabin Republican Suddenly Realizes He's One of the Bad Guys

No one here thinks it's strange that there isn't a person of color present. 

Jerry Speer is young, gay, a top notch karaoke singer, and a Republican. He traveled with a local group of Log Cabin Republicans down to Washington DC in order to advocate for the Supreme Court to revoke DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act.

Although the temperature was chilly on this March day in the nation's capital, Jerry's and his friends' hearts were warm with the hope that the liberal justices on the court could convince a few of their conservative peers to vote for equal rights.

The air was thick with cognitive dissonance.


"Go back to San Fransisco, you gayboes!" shouted Alfred Shipley from across the street, a member of Jerry's local Republican Party Committee. Alfred had also traveled to Washington DC, and was standing in a huge crowd of right wing hate mongers hoping to convince the court to keep DOMA intact.

Jerry smiled and waved back to Alfred and at the lame insult. Even though it was still early in the morning, he had heard many colorful remarks from members of his own political party.

This is great, Jerry thought to himself, we're all here to support the democratic process.

But somewhere in the back of Jerry's mind came a voice -- a voice of reason. It was a strange, and had a distinct upper class English accent, making it much more authoritative. "Jerry, this is Richard Dawkins, famed evolutionary biologist and atheist. You have to listen to me: You are supporting the very people who are restricting your basic human right to marry someone you love. Jerry, you are complicit in your own subjugation. Your thinky gob on top of your shoulders isn't working right. Wake up!"

Suddenly, it was as if a fog had lifted, and Jerry saw the truth: He had been bamboozled by the idea that  Christian fundamentalists and their political wing, i.e., the Republican Party would ever accept him.

Screw this, he thought, I can be a fiscally conservative Democrat. Maybe even a Libertarian -- at least they are against the Drug War.

He immediately felt better, and quietly shifted away to where his new political friends were protesting.




1 comment:

  1. Being gay and a Republican is shocking yet many go one step further and are Gay&Christian! Talk about hating yourself and/or working against your own best interest. And so it goes. https://plus.google.com/112202360043807944840/posts/LdLTi2qihnw

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