Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Mississippi Passes Anti-Richard Dawkins Legislation

Mississippi: Protecting God's children


Mississippi has officially made talking about Richard Dawkins, the famed atheist and biologist,  to minors illegal. Bill A.C.A. 5-71-226, otherwise known as the Anti-Youth Subversion Act, passed both houses of the legislature by an overwhelming margin, and signed into law by Governor Haley Barbour. Governor Barbour praised the bill, and stated that he hoped that it would serve as an example for other states to emulate.
Today we struck a blow for religious freedom in the great state of Mississippi. For too long our children have been unprotected against the nefarious teachings of Richard Dawkins. I have personally talked to many concerned parents who said that they were horrified when their children told them that God was a delusion or that human beings are simply carbon-based robots who took orders from the D-N-A. This law puts the end of that nonsense now. Let's pray that Mississippi will be a beacon of hope for the rest of our Christian nation.
 Here is an excerpt from the law.


5-71-226.  Anti-Youth Subversion Act.

(a) (1) It is unlawful for any person eighteen years or older to refer to Richard Dawkins, memes, selfish genes, The Greatest Show on Earth, DNA, and any other publication penned by the person in question, as well as books, periodicals, and/or other media that are based in part on Dawkins' work to a minor.

(b) Any adult found guilty of violating this act will be subject to thirty days (30) of incarceration as well as fine not higher than five hundred (500) dollars.

Religious leaders collectively stated that the passing of 5-71-226 was a victory for traditional morality. Church bells rang out and congregations celebrated the event with old-time fervor.



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33 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. My blood pressure went through the roof, because this is just the kind of stupid religious censorship that one would expect from Mississippi. Well done, Andy!

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  2. Haley Barbour isn't the governor anymore. Phil Bryant took over in January. When did this happen?

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    Replies
    1. Really? Dammit! My fake story isn't accurate!
      But seriously, thanks for pointing that out.

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  3. Although fake, it wouldn't at all surprise me to see something like this actually happen.

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    Replies
    1. The best kinds of satire are those that ride so close to reality that you believe it, even if only for a moment.

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  4. Until I saw the mention of Barbour, I was thinking, "I live here. How could I not have heard about this?"

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    1. I am with you on this one. I was born and raised in MS and moved from there to New Mexico in May of 2011. I was ashamed to say that I came from Mississippi till I saw the "Gov. Haley Barbor" had signed it into law. I was like WTF?

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  5. I thought this was real for a second just because anything is possible among the deluded, especially in Mississippi.

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    Replies
    1. When you have the confederate flag part of your state flag, nothing sounds too crazy.

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  6. who did they burn an efegy of super awesome president Obama or super awesome Richard "Papa Bear" Dawkins, or both.I vaguely recal this sketdch comedy show in the ,like, mid 80's and it was a news spoof, but if you didn't know any better, you would just think it was the news. Forgot what that shit was called...and they never broke character, they played it straight the whole time. I'm gonna ask my brother.

    Kriss

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  7. Excellent parody. Almost had me fooled there...

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  8. If you're talking about Mississippi, Louisiana or Texas, it's just too damned hard to distinguish satire from reality any longer. Takes the fun out of it. You read stuff like this and you begin to wonder if you should start stocking canned goods, medicines, guns and ammo.

    Lurker111

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  9. Scary that this is potentially the next move for Christians. I would have written 'logical move', but we know from experience, they don't believe in logic ^^

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  10. This was pretty brilliant. I was searching everywhere to corroborate the story! Interestingly, it's not far from the truth. Aside from hammering the ridiculousness of the faux-legislation, I was really going to attack "...the great state of Mississippi" part. Good form, Andy, good form indeed.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks. I wanted to communicate the arrogance of the insane.

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  11. Be careful. Don't give Mississippi any ideas.

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  12. Carbon robots under the command of The DNA, that would confuse many Americans

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  13. I was ready to write a reply about free speech only being free when you agree with the majority. Then I started reading the other replies and Poe's Law kicked me back into reality. Brilliant spoof and much too close to reality.

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  14. You made this crap up, right? Dawkins Rules! Dawkins for God!

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  15. What is really troubling to me is the fact that we could actually see this being real. It drives home how scary the religious right really are.

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  16. Hilarious! I loved the part where you said "took orders from the D-N-A"

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  17. Hey, get your facts straight! Everyone knows this law was passed in Oklahoma.

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  18. seriously almost blew a gasket. this shit actually sounds like something that those morons would pull.

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  19. Not quite as Poe as Edgar Allen, but still a masterful Poe.

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  20. As I read the comments I can't help but notice that - although most folks realize this is a work of fiction - they let go of the facts and retain the emotion. Comments like ' this is how those idiots think' and 'that is the kind of thing those fools would do' show how a work of fiction can feed a confirmation bias. Be clear here: This is a work of fiction. Whether or not they 'would' have done it, the fact is they did not do it. This is a strategy that the Right uses all the time. Apparently not only does the Left use it, we eat it up as well. We can do better. This is a work of fiction and doesn't support any belief we may have about 'Them'.

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