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Monday, May 17, 2010
Our Calendar, Satan's Plaything!
God hates our calendar.
Exhibit A The days of the week and what/who they are named after.
Sunday - Sun's Day
Monday - Moon's Day
Tuesday - Tyr's, Norse god of war and law, Day
Wednesday - Woden's, Anglo-Saxon god, Day
Thursday - Thor, Norse god of badasses, Day
Friday - Frigg's, Germanic love goddess, Day
Saturday - Saturn's, Roman god of agriculture, Day
Our days of the week smell with the foul icky stench of paganism. It's like twisting the spear in the side of our beloved saviour when we use these pagan names.
Exhibit B Harken to our months and who/what they are named after...
January - Janus, Roman god of doorways (what a lame god that is!)
February - Februa, the Roman celebration of cleaning (even more lame!)
March - Mars, the Roman god of war
April - could be derived from Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of hot babes
May - Maiss, the Greek goddess of fertility
June - Juno, a Roman goddess who is married to Jupiter
July - Julius Caesar, the military dictator who helped destroy the Roman Republic
August - Augustus Caesar, the military dictator who finished off the Roman Republic
September - Septem, the Latin word for seven
October - Octo, the Latin word for eight
November - Novem, the Latin word for nine
December - Decem, the Latin word for ten
Our months are named after a combination of despots, pagan gods, and Latin words.
If I were God I'd be pissed too.
Our Christian Nation needs Christian names! My humble suggestions for the days/months:
Sunday - Jesus Tells You To Go To Church Day
Monday - Jesus Day
Tuesday - Jesus Loves You Day
Wednesday - Do What Jesus Tells You To Do Or Burn In Hell Day
Thursday - Prepare For The Rapture Day
Friday - Pray For The Tribulation To Get Here Fast Day
Saturday - Laugh At The Sinners In Hell Day (What the heck, it's the weekend)
January - Jesus 1
February - Jesus 2
March - Jesus 3
Well, I think you get the idea.